I didn’t grow up in the 1950′s but I’ve read about the decade here and there. From what I understand, it was a time of great scientific discovery and, as author Bill Bryson puts it, “A time when everything was good for you.”
Wouldn’t it have been fun to live in an age where everything was good for you? Before-dinner drinks, after-dinner drinks, x-rays, sugar, lard, cigarettes, preservatives, plumes of insecticide … My adulthood feels like the exact opposite. Everything is bad for you. Everything.
Well, everything except the disgusting health food crap like Omega 3 Fatty Acids that make you feel like you’re going to lose your lunch. But it’s good for you, so you should eat your Omega 3 Fish Oil every single day – upset stomach, nausea, barfing, and excessive gas be damned!
I have heard that, in the 1950′s, some shoe stores offered feet x-rays to determine what size shoe a customer might need. My generation looks at that and thinks, “That’s a terrible idea! How could anyone have ever thought getting regular x-rays was perfectly safe?!” And then that makes me wonder if, one day, my child will say to her friends, “Can you believe our mothers bought eggs and tortillas fortified with Omega 3 Fish Oil?! What on earth were they thinking?! And they took it while they were pregnant! It’s a wonder we don’t all have 6 heads!”
In case you can’t read that small print, “How soon is too soon? Not soon enough. Laboratory tests over the last few years have proven that babies who start drinking soda during that early formative period have a much higher chance of gaining acceptance and ‘fitting in’ during those awkward pre-teen and teen years. So, do yourself a favor. Do your child a favor. Start them on a strict regimine of sodas and other sugary carbonated beverages right now, for a lifetime of guaranteed happiness.”
So that’s why I was such an awkward kid … not enough Coke!
In short, while I would hate to have lived during the 1960′s and had to have eaten crap like tomato aspic with green olives and rosemary bar-b-que sauce, I would love to have lived during the 1950′s when it was socially acceptable (and even encouraged) to feed your baby Coca-Cola.